ラベル To nice and kind people の投稿を表示しています。 すべての投稿を表示
ラベル To nice and kind people の投稿を表示しています。 すべての投稿を表示

2012年6月13日水曜日

Supersonic/Electronic Weapon 不特定多数による長期にわたる原因不明の嫌がらせ(6)


2012/06/13 (Mon) Wtb 1:45. Slpt fm 1:30-5:30-10:00  (4 + 4.5 hrs).
1:45 e-shocks to brain + fits

Had lessons at Yotsuya (17:00-20:40 ), left school around 21:30, got to my station around 22:30, bought food, and got home a little before 23:00.

Reacted aggressively to some nasty stares a few times. Also, I may have looked away from some people who did nothing wrong to me, but just walked toward my direction at a fast pace or were walking behind a person who was giving me a nasty stare. I want to stop doing this. I used to do this to because all that gathered around me but for rare exceptions were bad people and they used to do nasty things. I know I shouldn’t do this but before I know I react. I’m sorry for doing this to some nice people at Oshiage this afternoon. And I am sorry if I had done this to people who had done nothing to me.


2012年6月11日月曜日

Supersonic/Electronic Weapon 不特定多数による長期にわたる原因不明の嫌がらせ(6)





2012/06/10 (Sun) Wtb at 0:35. Spt fm around 0:30-6:00 (5.5hrs).

many e-shocks to brain + fits when I was falling sleep

around 6:00 fit t lower body + huff

-6:10 a noise that sounded like gooooo from the street-side, which was a vibrating noise to my skull

game/car-like noise



Marked essays and evaluated mock test essays at the fast food restaurant in the station building till a little before 17:00, did shopping, bought food, consulted with Soft Bank, ate ice cream, and got home.



I wrote that I liked the woman at the ice cream shop last time I went there, and today, her attitude was odd, kind of dry, which she had not been. She had also lost weight. The same thing happened with the fish shop in Koiwa several years ago.



The young woman I made friends with at the fast food shop has stopped coming there. The last time we met at the shop, she looked sad and gave me two pieces of cute magnets. She liked me but left me.



I do not write about those people I like on this blog anymore. Actually I have been doing so, I mean I have not written about people whom I like, for a while. This blog is about harassment anyway.



The last time I went to the ice cream shop, went to see the woman (on January  12th this year, was the day I learned that my mother was dying and her days left were really limited. It seems that I often go there when I am sad. Today, I was, too. Though I do not think I’ll go there anymore as she suffers from my going there.



アイスクリーム屋さんには、よく、悲しい時におばさんの顔を見に行っている。今日もそうだった。おばさんに迷惑がかかっているみたいだからもう行かないと思うけど。








2012年6月1日金曜日

Supersonic/Electronic Weapon 不特定多数による長期にわたる原因不明の嫌がらせ(6)





The rest of the record:

Did house work and prepared for classes in the morning.

When tried to take a nap, I was hit by e-shocks in the brain twice, first weak and then strong. The second one was beam-like between ears with my earmuffs.



Went to the fast food restaurant to supplement sleep and prepare for work. Stayed there till 17:00, bought food, and got home around 17:30.





To a nice and kind person I happened to see at the bridge in the evening,

I looked at the other alley at the point where the street forked right before the bridge when you turned around and probably saw me. I was wondering if you thought that I looked away from you for some reason. I did not look away from you. I just looked the other way to see if someone else was coming towards me. There is no reason for me to be hateful to you people, who have been so nice and warm to me, even after I gave up f, and became absorbed in reading most of the time on the train. I will always like you people even though we cannot stop things from changing…I ran more than half of the bridge to catch up with you so that you could hear me walking cheerful and thankful as usual, but you walked so fast that I was not able to … I was laughing at myself so slow and odd in running, with tears in my eyes .. :)



To nice and kind people I saw on the train yesterday,

I think you let me know that things are changing. I wouldn’t write details because there aren’t always nice people on the train and people notice things much better than we think. I just do not know exactly what is going on but just thank everyone and hope things will work well for everyone.


2012年5月13日日曜日

Supersonic/Electronic Weapon 不特定多数による長期にわたる原因不明の嫌がらせ(6)


2012/05/12 (Sat) wtb at 1:49. Spt from 2:00-5:30 +8:30-9:30 (3.5 + 1 hrs).

1:49 game/car-like noise

1:58 e-shock to brain

2:00 fit of upper body

2:01 esb

2:03 esb + a noise that sounded like something hit the wall of from 202

around 5:30 the noises in my head became loud and wavy + g/c

5:34 noise from 202

6:27 l/w

-8:20 read a book

8:27 esb (strong)

-8:30 several esbs, the last two caused my jaws to shut

8:30 the noise that something hit on the wall of 202

9:25 esb



feeling of after-concussion long after I got up

9:53 loud TV sound or male voice from 202 (later in an hour or so again)



Had lessons at Yotsuya from 13:30 to 18:55. Made many mistakes such as forgetting supplemental materials to a student who had been absent last time, forgetting taking one of today’s supplementary materials, forgetting handing out one of the homework materials, and making a great number of unnecessary copies.



Not able to leave school till almost 20:00 because of multiple mistakes I had made today.

Arrived at my station around 21:00. bought food, and got home around 21:20.



I did not go to the fast food restaurant as I had written sometime in March in one of the records entitled To f. From now on, I might go there or not in the evening depending how I feel. But I think most of the time I wouldn’t so that I may not feel uncomfortable.



To nice and kind people,

I have got a new toy, an electric reader, and I have been reading most of the time I ride trains this week. If I had ignored you, I am very very sorry. Once I start reading, I forget everything. I know it is bad. But please understand. The eye-friendly screen with large fonts brought back my old fun-habit. I had been reading on the train most of the time before this harassment started/became harsh, and, combined with my eyes becoming bad and fatigue caused by sleep deprivation, I had hardly read on the train for more than five years. I tried not to use the reader before others since I did not want to look showing off the new thing, though it is much less expensive compared to smart-phones or tablets, but I could not resist the desire to read when it became possible for me to read in the train. I have been spending happiest time with Huckleberry Finn this week… :) “I cannot think of nothing else,” if I put it in Huck’ s way. I’ll be back soon, I think, and I will… :)




2012年4月27日金曜日

Supersonic/Electronic Weapon 不特定多数による長期にわたる原因不明の嫌がらせ(6)


The rest of the record:

After uploading the blog and preparing for going out, somebody came into the next room (202) loudly, and a male voice started talking with somebody in the room.



Went out and marked essays at the bakery coffee shop and the fast food restaurant in the station building from around 16:00 to 19:30, and got home a little before 20:00. When I got home and took out the garbage, a tall and stout male whose body was like that of the crazy-looking male I saw yesterday but with a totally different face in a white T-shirt and white pants came out of Room 103, came out of the gate, stared at my face, and went to the main street and the bridge.



I saw Room 104, whose mail box has a No Flier sticker, lit. Also, Room 106, from which the two women who went into Room 202 came out last night, has the same sticker.



Tomorrow, I have classes from 13:00 to 16:55 at Yotsuya, mover to Tokyo Station by 20:00, and leave for ShinOsaka as soon as possible. I am supposed to meet my family at the Central Exit in ShinOsaka. The ceremony for my mother will be held in a small village in Yamaguchi prefecture. According to my father, I can be back to ShinOsaka by 16;00 on Monday. I have regular classes at Yotsuya on Tuesday.




Supersonic/Electronic Weapon 不特定多数による長期にわたる原因不明の嫌がらせ(6)





2012/0427 (Fri) Went to bed around 1:30. Slept from 1:30-5:00 + 6:30-8:40 (3.5 + 2 hrs).



去年の秋1回目、2回目の授業で(逆セクハラだと思われたくなくて、また、君の当時の英語レベルと気持ちを見極めきれなくて、そして睡眠不足とAO入試の添削でぼろぼろだったこともあり)私が声かけを十分にしなかったためだと思うのですが、君のためにやっているといってもいいことがほとんど毎回届かなかったXX君、ごめんなさい。「救ってあげられなかった」などというのは思い上がった考え方かもしれないけれど、そういう申し訳ない気持ちです。まだ時間はあるのであきらめないで欲しいと思います。



《詳細》

土曜日のTOEICのクラスは、TOEFLや英検など、より難しい資格試験の補助的な位置にあることをふまえて、秋季前半以外は、英語が苦手な生徒さんに照準を合わせた内容にしています。

先日までの春期講習ではそういった生徒さんのために新しい補助教材を準備し、この春学期に入ってからは、1)手書きの文法問題の文構造(文型と修飾関係)と部分訳の解説プリントを配布し、2)同問題プリントの答案を提出してもらって、個別に、間違えた問題が正解にならない理由を書き込んで返却するということを開始しました。また、このブログにも最近アップした5~7月のTOEIC受験用学習予定表も英語が苦手な人と比較的得意な人の両方が使えるように設定してあります。

それなのに、そのような新たな試みを開始するたびに、その初日から対象の中心としている生徒さんが授業に来なくなるということが昨年の秋以降数回あり、皮肉なことに今回の1)+2)の変更及び学習プランの配布の日からは、そこまでのケアは必要なさそうなレベルの生徒さんがどっと増えています。

これまでも、コースを始めてみて、教材や授業の進め方を変更すことはありましたが(そうやって今の補助教材や授業スタイルになってきたのですが)対象とする「救いたい」生徒さんが途中で授業に来なくなることはありませんでした。いつかこのブログにGood luck!と題して書いたf君の場合も似た状況があった気がします。本当に残念です。誰が悪いのでもなく、遠慮がちな良い人が損をしている気がしてつらいです。そういう人が損をしないように生徒さんの分からないところを全員個別に解決する方法を考えたのに。





After talking with my sisters about the family trip for our late mother this weekend, it turned out that my father’s talks about it differ in many ways from my sisters’. For example, the car will be rented, while he said we will ride one of my nephew’s car for eight people. Maybe a change of plan, but when I pointed it out, my sister did not say anything like that. Well, he is old and has had that character of believing things for his wish and convenience. I suspect he can and probably does even tell lies for his purpose.

I have half of his genes and get depressed about it thinking above.





The details of the harassment:

I wrote I feel better and look better since I had been having straight more-than-5-hour sleeps, I have been woken up after sleeping 4 hours or less again starting yesterday due to harassment. (5時間以上連続で眠れる日が続いて気分も見かけも良くなったと書いた途端に、昨日から嫌がらせで4時間以下しか連続して眠られなくなった。)



One young woman was hostile to me for a reason I cannot guess. And many people harassed me and tried to disrupt my concentration on work or sleep. Specifically, they moved their arms around unnaturally when they were in my view, stopping after I moved away, and coughing and making noises unnaturally sharp and loud when I was trying to sleep. Since I have had accustomed rather fewer harassments, I was bothered more.



4:54 the noises in my head became loud and wavy

Read some article for about an hour and tried to sleep again.

6:18 1 e-shock after sleep-sitting for a few minutes with my face down.

6:20  1 e-shock(?)

6:22 3 e-shocks which became stronger one after another, the last of which was accompanied by a noise Goh, and after this one, very slight sensations that cannot be called e-shocks repeated several times

8:40 woke up to a call from one of my sisters, the younger one.







 

2012年4月25日水曜日

Supersonic/Electronic Weapon 不特定多数による長期にわたる原因不明の嫌がらせ(6)




2012/04/26 (Thu) Went to bed at 0:17. Slept from 0:30-4:50 (4 hrs).

0:28  1 e-shock to brain (very strong) accompanied by a flash and a noise (from 202)

4:51 the noises in my head became loud an wavy

4:51 the loud wavy noises became an e-shock and sounded shooooo

I put my head on the other side of mattress and in 10minutes the noises became less loud

5:33  1 e-shock to brain + the noise Goh (202)



Sent to the fast food restaurant to mark essays and to supplement sleep. Slept for 30 minutes. A few people made noises and coughed when I was trying to sleep. Stayed there from around 11:00 to 16:00. Bought some more offerings for my mother and snacks for my family and sent them by the delivery service. Went to a bakery coffee shop and marked essays till around 20:20, bought food and got home around 20:30.



When I was leaving in the morning, a huge man with crazy eyes with crazy smile, in his 50s with wide forehead, in white long probably underwear, appeared and looked into my eyes on the stairs and passed me when I was walking them down, and then a woman in her 50’s or 60’s, whom I greeted politely the other day or yesterday appeared at the foot of the stairs.



When I was taking the plastic trash in the evening, I saw the same woman and a young woman came out of the third room from the back on the first floor, where I saw the same black folding umbrella with small pink bow patterns which had hung at Room 202, the next room of mine, was hanging at the door a few weeks ago, and went into the next room of mine (202).





Though 29th will be the 49th day memorial of my mother, today is exactly the 30th day after her departure. Time flies. About the early 49th memorial, my father explains that date of the ceremony and the ash placing was decided so that they are conducted with as many family members as possible. I think it makes sense though it is very early. A little strange is that the first week memorial was not shared by relatives and a few female relatives asked me with a strange smile whether the seventh day ceremony was done or not on the day of the wake and funeral, I recall.





Made friends with a young woman at the fast food shop and exchanged numbers. We have kind of known each other since winter. I’m not writing details to protect her privacy. I’m writing this just because the instant we started exchanging numbers after chatting for a while, the atmosphere of a group of males sitting in the back, who seemed to be faculty of a university, stood up, and left. The leaving noise seemed much louder than can be described normal, and this move of theirs just stuck to my mind.


2012年4月24日火曜日

Supersonic/Electronic Weapon 不特定多数による長期にわたる原因不明の嫌がらせ(6)




2012/04/23 (Mon) Went to bed at 0:45. Slept from 1:00-3:00 + 3:30-8:20 (2 + 5 hrs).

Around 0:43 When I was still sitting and drooping, with my eyes lightly closed, an e-shock came.

0:55 1 e-shock to brain

0:57 1 e-shock to brain (stronger)

-1:00 several e-shocks to brain

-0:01 4 e-shocks to brain (every 5 seconds)

1:04 several + a very strong e-shocks to brain, the last shock, the strong one shook my head sideways

Around 3:00 game/car-like noise

3:15 1 e-shock to brain

8:20 the noises in my head became loud and wavy



Had a class in Shibuya. Finished class around 21:00, got to my station around 22:00 and got in a little past 22:00.



In a narrow allay in a McDonald’s in Shibuya, where I stayed from around 16:30 to 18:00, a nice person lightly bowed to me when I made room for him and his friend, but I was a second late to bow back. Sorry.



I felt good today. I think I also looked better than usual today. I thank you, nice and kind people. No other people than you have made me recover this much. Thanks! :)

I would have felt best if f had shown up again, but maybe it would have been too good. I have given him up. I hope everything will be fine for you and f…:)




2012年4月22日日曜日

Supersonic/Electronic Weapon 不特定多数による長期にわたる原因不明の嫌がらせ(6)




2012/04/21 (Sat) Went to bed around 1:35 Slept from 1:50-5:20 + 6:00-9:00 (4 + 2hrs).

-       1:41 several e-shocks to brain (gradually became stronger)

around 5:20 woke up and fell asleep around 6:00

8:10 the noises in my head became loud and wavy

8:21 1 fit of left thumb

8:24 2 fits of right leg muscles ( 2 muscles)

8:41 1 fit of left thumb placed under body, and pain in the thumb because it moved under the weight of my body

8:51 1e-shock and fit of back shoulder 



Had lessons at Yotsuya from 13:30. Though the last class finished around 19:10, I couldn’t leave there first for orientation for new students for about 20 minutes and next answering questions till 20:50. I arrived at my station at 21:45. I got home around 22:00.



To nice and kind people,

Because I, a bird lover, like its another name, and as many people regard it as a gesture of protest, I often give the middle finger, or flip birds, to dirty-spirited harassing men. But I’ll stop doing it because it seems to embarrass you and I realized doing it degrades me, though I do not think my attitude cannot be at any lower level in terms of propriety than now. At least I will try not to do it anyway.



鳥が好きなので、「鳥を振る」という別名が好きだし、プロテストのしぐさという認知もかなりあるので、嫌がらせをする男性にはよく指を立てていますが、やっぱり恥ずかしいことらしいので、止めます。少なくとも努力します。




2012年4月18日水曜日

Supersonic/Electronic Weapon 不特定多数による長期にわたる原因不明の嫌がらせ(6)

2012/04/17 (Tue) Went to bed around 1:50 Slept from 2:00-7:30 (5.5 hrs).
1:50-for several minutes several e-shocks + huffing caused by a shock
7:30 the game/car-like noise woke me up

Silent prayer for my mother’s third week after her death in the train on my way to work.

Had two lessons (17:00-a little before 21:00) at Yotsuya. Left school a little past 21:00, got to my station about 10 past 22:00, bought food, and got home around 22:30.

On my way back, in the subway (Hanzomon-line),I jumped out of the seat when a man sat next to me. All I could see was the male body in a suit and the cell-phone, and the quick movement. He looked like a good man, and I regretted escaping him like a cockroach. I even thought of going back to the seat, but my body did not move. I think it was because I had encountered more numbers of abusers and had been annoyed a lot. Trusting and letting a male sit right next to me, without any space in between, is still very difficult for me to do. I am sorry anyway…It was not you but my experience of nasty Japanese males, ……well maybe I should say MAINLY Japanese males to be a pacifist but definitely and accurately MAINLY Japanese males….., that made me avoid you… (Till recently, I couldn’t tell the difference between Mongolian peoples in my country Japan: Japanese, Koreans, and Chinese, probably Mongolians sometimes. But now I can tell some from the others because they have some lovely character…:) And I cannot find in my memory people like them among those who used to relentlessly and sadistically harass me both individually and in groups till recently.)

Before and after I got up avoiding the probably innocent male, there was a male who kept looking at me with the evil smile, looking into my eyes whenever he had a chance to. He was in his 50s, middle height for his generation and middle weight, wore a suit, looked like an office worker, and was with his wife. He kept talking euphorically for rather a long time till he noticed all the others were quiet. Then at one station came in a fat male and stood in front of me facing me unnaturally close to me with a lap top opened. That first male became alive again and seemed to savor watching me. His euphoria lasted another several stations. A few stops before Oshiage, the station where many people including me get off, he coughed loudly, which action many males, sometimes females, used to take, and which seemed to cue harassers’ “cooperation”. Tonight, nobody reacted. At Oshiage, the male stood in front of the door opposite the point where I was standing. As I watched him get off and walk toward the escalator on the platform, he kept wearing a wondering face, as if saying to himself that something was wrong while there was nothing wrong with him. He was 99 % a Japanese. Or a Chinese. His face looked like that of a delinquent cousin of the Chinese President now, three or four of whom I see in the street every day. (誰か私の毒舌を止めてください。Somebody stop my sharp tongue, please.)


Note: 2012/03/04 and 2012/04/15 at the fast food restaurant in the station building I often go to are the days and place that I saw the “real lovers of violence and humiliation.”

2012年4月17日火曜日

Supersonic/Electronic Weapon 不特定多数による長期にわたる原因不明の嫌がらせ(6)

2012/04/16 (Mon) went to bed around 2:10 Slept from 2:30-7:30 (5 hrs).
- 2:22 3 e-shocks to brain + the game/car-like noise
7:58 1 big fit of the whole body
8:01 1 fit of brain which felt like electric field distorting the flows inmy brain
8:15 female vice talking probably on the phone, the voice sounded like electric mixed with noises
8:30 game/car-like noises + fit of right index finger placed under head

Went to the dermatologist’s in the morning. (This was the third time. I went there to make sure the red lump in my right ear was nothing, and it was really nothing. Probably I hit myself in the ear sometime in March.)

Had a class in Shibuya (19:00-20:40 + extra 30 minutes). Left the school about 10 past 21:00, got to my station 10 after 22:00, bought food, and got home a little before 22:30.

I did not tie my hear today. This is the second time this year, I think. The reason is to prevent hair-loss. Whenever it looks ok to leave my hair untied, I will go out without tying my hair from now on. Last year, I stopped tying my hair for a while for f, but now there is no meaning other than to save hair, so those nasty middle-aged males who wear dirty smiles looking at my untied hair, stop it. You are sickening. (昨年の夏はfさんのために髪を降ろしましたが、今は、ハゲ対策です。ですので、私のおろした髪を見てへらへらしている中年以上のおやじさんたち、気持ち悪いのでやめてください。よろしくおねがいします。)

2012年4月16日月曜日

Supersonic/Electronic Weapon 不特定多数による長期にわたる原因不明の嫌がらせ(6)

2012/04/17 (Tue) Went to bed around 1:50 Slept from 2:00-7:30 (5.5 hrs).
1:50-for several minutes several e-shocks + huffing caused by a shock
7:30 the game/car-like noise woke me up

Silent prayer for my mother’s third week after her death in the train on my way to work.

Had two lessons (17:00-a little before 21:00) at Yotsuya. Left school a little past 21:00, got to my station about 10 past 22:00, bought food, and got home around 22:30.

On my way back, in the subway (Hanzomon-line),I jumped out of the seat when a man sat next to me. All I could see was the male body in a suit and the cell-phone, and the quick movement. He looked like a good man, and I regretted escaping him like a cockroach. I even thought of going back to the seat, but my body did not move. I think it was because I had encountered more numbers of abusers and had been annoyed a lot. Trusting and letting a male sit right next to me, without any space in between, is still very difficult for me to do. I am sorry anyway…It was not you but my experience of nasty Japanese males, ……well maybe I should say MAINLY Japanese males to be a pacifist but definitely and accurately MAINLY Japanese males….., that made me avoid you… (Till recently, I couldn’t tell the difference between Mongolian peoples in my country Japan: Japanese, Koreans, and Chinese, probably Mongolians sometimes. But now I can tell some from the others because they have some lovely character…:) And I cannot find in my memory people like them among those who used to relentlessly and sadistically harass me both individually and in groups till recently.)

Before and after I got up avoiding the probably innocent male, there was a male who kept looking at me with the evil smile, looking into my eyes whenever he had a chance to. He was in his 50s, middle height for his generation and middle weight, wore a suit, looked like an office worker, and was with his wife. He kept talking euphorically for rather a long time till he noticed all the others were quiet. Then at one station came in a fat male and stood in front of me facing me unnaturally close to me with a lap top opened. That first male became alive again and seemed to savor watching me. His euphoria lasted another several stations. A few stops before Oshiage, the station where many people including me get off, he coughed loudly, which action many males, sometimes females, used to take before harassers’ “corporation” started. Tonight, nobody reacted. At Oshiage, the male stood in front of the door opposite the point where I was standing. As I watched him get off and walk toward the escalator on the platform, he kept wearing a wondering face, as if saying to himself that something was wrong while there was nothing wrong with him. He was 99 % a Japanese, or a Chinese. He looked like a good-for-nothing relative of the Chinese President now, three or four of whom I see every day. (誰か私の毒舌を止められる方、付き合ってください。Somebody who can stop my sharp tongue, be my man, please.)


Note: 2012/03/04 and 2012/04/15 are the days when I saw the “real lovers of violence and humiliation.”

2012年4月11日水曜日

Supersonic/Electronic Weapon 不特定多数による長期にわたる原因不明の嫌がらせ(6)

2012/04/11 (Wed) Went to bed 23:30on the 10th. Slept from 0:00-2:30 (2.5 hrs).
Woke/woken up after 2.5 hours of sleep and have been prevented from sleeping, giving up trying to sleep again.

23:46 1 e-shock to brain
23:48 1 e-shock to brain + fit of head (big) + the noise Goh from the next room (202)
2:49 1 e-shock to the top left brain + the noises in my head became loud and wavy
3:00 1 e-shock to brain
Remembering my father’s sexual harassment and thinking the same might happen during the family trip for mother’s memorial and ash-placing at the end of this month, I got upset for a while.
---5:00 studied
5:14 2-3 e-shocks to brain + fit of right toe
--- drank hot milk
6:02 1 e-shock to brain (strong) + fit of right ankle
6:03 fit of left middle finger placed under head + the noise Goh

The rest of the record:
Went to the fast food restaurant to supplement sleep and prepare for classes. I slept for 20 minutes. There was a very nice person. Another nice person relieved my embarrassment of accidentally making a noise. Although I was a little rough to some males that were acting strange - sorry I couldn’t help- , I behaved ok to people who were nice to me.

However, I failed to behave honestly when I left the supermarket. Two women with apparently, and almost comically, bully-looks appeared when I got out of the supermarket, and I took a sideway, instead of going straight towards the person who was nice to me, not in any special meaning but in a friendly way, before I went into the supermarket. When I started heading toward the back allay instead of the station where the person stood, my eyes met those of the person, who looked wondering why I was not going straight as usual. I did not mean to avoid the person, but it might have looked that way. Also, I did not even smile to the person, which would have erased all the oddness of the situation. I’m sorry. I’m writing this so that I can behave better tomorrow, though I won’t be able to see the person anymore.

21:48, fell asleep despite electric shocks and had a bad dream of my father who seemed to have cracked reach me as he speak totally sanely in a loud voice. I woke up with my voice, when the interphone was rung by a delivery person. I think I slept for 30 minutes or so.

2012年4月10日火曜日

Supersonic/Electronic Weapon 不特定多数による長期にわたる原因不明の嫌がらせ(6)

2012/04/10 (Tue) Went to bed 1:34 Slept from 2:00-8:30 (6.5 hrs).

I think, without the nice and kind people who have been encouraging me and helping me, and without the little talk with f I had last summer, I wouldn’t have been in such good terms with my family as now, with whom I had not met and had little contact for 15 years till last month….

The details and the rest of the record:
1:41 2 e-shocks to brain + the noise Goh from the net room
1:43 2 e-shocks + a noise behind the wall of the next room
1:56 1 e-shock to brain

Had a lesson (16:40-18:00) at Chofu. Came back to my station a little after 19:00, bought food, and got home a little before 19:30.
A silent prayer for my mother’s second week of her death.

Called father at night to let him know I sent a package to him and sisters containing a pajama pants I borrowed while there and some gifts. I was told that the days of fortieth day memorial of my mother and placing her ashes in the family tomb have been decided: from the evening of the 28th to the 30th. I am supposed to take the last bullet train on the 28th (Sat) to Shin-Oska, where one of my nephew’s van picks me up, and then all the family head to a small town, Susa in Yamaguchi prefecture. It seems that we are staying at a cheap old inn in the town. The way father talked about it reminded me of his sexual harassment and made me uneasy. I’m joining this trip purely for my mother and goodwill of other family members, and if he does something nasty to me during the trip I will stop contacting him.

Supersonic/Electronic Weapon 不特定多数による長期にわたる原因不明の嫌がらせ(6)

2012/04/10 (Tue) Went to bed 1:34 Slept from 2:00-8:30 (6.5 hrs).

I think, without the nice and kind people who have been encouraging me and helping me, and without the little talk with f I had last summer, I wouldn’t have been in such good terms with my family as now, with whom I had not met and had little contact for 15 years till last month….

The details and the rest of the record: http://junglecrowsister.blogspot.jp/2012/04/supersonicelectronic-weapon_9563.html

Supersonic/Electronic Weapon 不特定多数による長期にわたる原因不明の嫌がらせ(6)

2012/04/09 (Mon) Went to bed around 2:00 Slept from 3:30 -6:30 (3 hrs).
2:05 game/car-like noises
2:30 car noises
2:34 1 e-shock to brain + fit of left thumb placed under head
2:40 1 e-shock between ears (earmuffs)
2:46 1 e-shock to brain
2:47 1 e-shock to brain
2:52 1 e-shock to brain
2:57 1 e-shock to brain
2:58 1 e-shock to brain (strong; felt like a fist blow)
2:59 1 e-shock to brain
3:03 1 e-shock to brain +right hip (weak)
3:04 1 e-shock to brain (strong, stinging)
3:11 1 e-shock to brain + fit of a muscle of left leg + the noise Goh
--- drank hot milk
around 3:30 when going to sleep, 1 e-shock to brain (weak); did not take a note and fell asleep
6:53 the noises in my head became loud and wavy
7:15 1 e-shock to brtain +Goh
8:00 1 e-shock tobrain + a noise someone/something move/hit something in the next room

Had a lesson (19:00-20:40 + 15 minute’s time of answering questions about how to study) at Shibuya. Left school around 21:00, arrived at my station 21:55, bought food, and got home a little past 22:00.

To f,
I miss you … I see many nice people these days―and I appreciate their heart. But if I could see you, I would be happier.

Supersonic/Electronic Weapon 不特定多数による長期にわたる原因不明の嫌がらせ(6)

2012/04/09 (Mon) Went to bed around 2:00 Slept from 3:30 -6:30 (3 hrs).
2:05 game/car-like noises
2:30 car noises
2:34 1 e-shock to brain + fit of left thumb placed under head
2:40 1 e-shock between ears (earmuffs)
2:46 1 e-shock to brain
2:47 1 e-shock to brain
2:52 1 e-shock to brain
2:57 1 e-shock to brain
2:58 1 e-shock to brain (strong; felt like a fist blow)
2:59 1 e-shock to brain
3:03 1 e-shock to brain +right hip (weak)
3:04 1 e-shock to brain (strong, stinging)
3:11 1 e-shock to brain + fit of a muscle of left leg + the noise Goh
--- drank hot milk
around 3:30 when going to sleep, 1 e-shock to brain (weak); did not take a note and fell asleep
6:53 the noises in my head became loud and wavy
7:15 1 e-shock to brtain +Goh
8:00 1 e-shock tobrain + a noise someone/something move/hit something in the next room

Had a lesson (19:00-20:40 + 15 minute’s time of answering questions about how to study) at Shibuya. Left school around 21:00, arrived at my station 21:55, bought food, and got home a little past 22:00.

To f,
I miss you … I see many nice people these days, but if I could see you, I would be happier.

2012年4月5日木曜日

Supersonic/Electronic Weapon 不特定多数による長期にわたる原因不明の嫌がらせ(6)

2012/04/05 (Wed) Went to bed around 23:40 Slept from 0:00-7:40-8:50 (7.5+ 1 hrs).
23:46 1 e-shock to brain + fit of left arm
-23:57 incessant e-shocks to brain
7:40 the noises in my brain suddenly became loud and wavy

Did housework in till early afternoon. Did walking and bought food between 15:00-16:00. Prepared for classes in the evening.

To f,
How are you? I hope you are fine...:)

2012年3月19日月曜日

Supersonic/Electronic Weapon 不特定多数による長期にわたる原因不明の嫌がらせ(6)

2012/03/19 (Mon) Went to bed around 0:50. Slept from 1:00-7:30 (6.5 hrs).
0:51 1 e-shock to brain (strong9 whose quick surge I felt come from the next room 202.
I think I woke up in the morning with a fit of my finger but not sure.

Have been hearing a loud male voice talking in the next room for about an hour. Now it’s 15:37. I’m leaving a little later for a class in Shibuya.

Hope everything is going well for everyone…

The rest of the record: Left home around 16:00, arrived at Shibuya station around 17:00, stayed at a book store near my school studying TOEIC books till a little past 18:00. Class finished around 20:50, left the school around 20:55, arrived at my station at 2-:50, though of staying at the fast food restaurant, but, since it was too late, gave up, bought food, and got home a little past 22:00.

It was the second week that I use the line in later hours. There were more harassing people than usual, but the difference was not so big as it used to be. On my way back, there was a male in his late 50s or 60’s sitting on the other side of my seat who kept looking into my eyes with an evil smile while taking notes contentedly, I kept my dignity and did not swear, although I said, “気持ち悪い目つき sickening stare, “ when I walked past him to get off to make it even by letting others know that he had been doing something dirty.

I would probably stop saying such things, too. I do not want people who have been nice to me to be blamed for my bad behavior despite the fact that they have nothing to do with it.

2012年3月13日火曜日

Supersonic/Electronic Weapon 不特定多数による長期にわたる原因不明の嫌がらせ(6)

Addition to the rest of the record on 2012/03/11
Spent a day at a hospital in Osaka from around 13:00 -19:15* and came back to Shinagawa around 23:15, got lost for five minutes, forwent the second from the last train at Sengakuji to call my family, came back to my station a little past 0:00, paid the rest of the fare I did not pay when I hurriedly took the train at Shinagawa, bought food, and got home around 0:15.
(added on 2012/03/13) *Although I had made sure that I could stay longer, making sure the last train was at 21:20, my mother said that I should not go home late, so I left about 30 minutes before the end of the visiting hours of the hospital.

Note: There was no one who harassed me in Osaka. I do not know whether it was because there are only a few people who harass me now anywhere or it was because Osaka people are nicer. Though I noticed many (probably more accurately, most) people I do not know seem to recognize me.

I was surprised that there was no woman who visits me to show off her offspring to me for a reason I do not know-this still happens at least once whenever I go out in Tokyo. I noticed this when a young woman with a baby in her arm rushed past me without looking at me, though I was within her sight. I tested with a couple of families by approaching them but none reacted aggressively or viciously to me. They naturally just viewed me as one of their passers-by.

(added on 2012/03/12) On my way from Shin-Osaka to the hospital, forgetting it’s cheaper to take the loop line to the private railway, I took the subway from Shin-Osaka in accordance with the internet information, the quickest way. I wanted to avoid having lunch only with my father, who habitually peeked my bath and once in a while touched my bust and leg in my college days, always makes me feel uncomfortable to dine with him, and rushed toward my body and was stopped by one of my sisters-this had never happened before-as I escaped when I was taking care of my mother while massaging her leg today. I had told him to call him when I arrived at Shin-Osaka, but I wanted to finish a quick meal before I arrive at the hospital station. I looked for a noodle stand in the stations but there was none or none of them was open, probably because it was Sunday. Near the Keihan-line entrance in Yodoyabashi station, I called my father and was asked repeatedly in a threatening way where I was. I hang up the phone and a few minutes later called again, which he did not answer, and left a message telling where I was and that I was taking the train to the hospital station. I bought some pastry and drink at a stand in Yodoyabashi and had them on the train, which had few people.

On the train on my way home, a man, who got on at Shin-Osaka and got off somewhere between, looked into my eye with evil smile and started reading his phone and a tall and slim man, who got on at Maibara or Nagoya and was still on when I got off at Shinagawa, took the next seat without asking if it was occupied and acted in a way I found somewhat unnatural although he was not a threat at all-(added on 2012/03/13)he kept using his smart phone or electric reader and a tablet never bothering me- and seemed nice when I got out of the seats. –( added on 21012/03/12) In retrospect, I am thankful to him because I was able to avoid having an uncomfortable company after a young woman (nice person) got off.

Because of two consecutive days of deprived sleep, (3 in total and 2 hrs.), I tried to sleep on both ways. One my way to Osaka, a shock which I could not tell was the e-shock or a twitch of nerves in my head occurred, whichever it was, it was unusual anyway. On my way back, I slept 20 minutes or so during the last one hour of the ride. One hour before that, I got clearly the same e-shock once when I was about to sleep but conscious. A young man with a blue and white striped scarf and glasses, middle height or short and middle weight, short hair, was sitting behind me, and when I looked back, he was looking at me with a slight smile.

(added on 2012/03/12 and 13) I saw some of the nice people I see in Tokyo in Osaka and Nagoya, too. They were not the same people, but the same kind of people. They seemed to recognize me but left me alone, even when I was doing stupid and/or unexplainable things*. They were gentle and warm. I could feel good vibes from them. Wishing you all health and good luck! :)

*(added on 2012/03/13) and probably making them wonder what in the world I was up to. For example, while I was on the subway Midosuji-line between Shin-Osaka and Yodoyabashi, instead of taking the loop-line as most visitors do, people who got on the train at Umeda or Higashi-Umeda looked worried half looking at me on the platform before coming into the train, to which I started wondering why there are so many nice but worried people here. I also remember I passed some nice-looking people worriedly, one or two angrily, staring at me from the time I started looking for the way to the subway (Midosuji line) in Shin-Osaka station till I get into the private railway (Keihan line).

Based on the facts I have written above and some other facts that I have reserved to write about, I think, though I am reluctant to, it can be concluded that there are some “nice” people among the truly nice people I see in the street, which I have started feeling a few months ago. Take care, truly nice people, though I know you can handle it! :)