Pre-TOEFL writing, Parents should make important decisions for their older teenage children

Writing Topic

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Parents or other adult relatives should make important decisions for their older (16-18 year-old) teenaged children. Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.

☆Let’s Think

The phrase “other adult relatives” would be for cases people like grandparents or uncles or aunts are playing the role of the older teenager’s parents for some reason. 16-18-yea- old people are high school students in general. They are between older children and young adults. Examples of important decisions might be decisions on whether to have a part-time job, whether to study abroad, or whether to go to university or not.

☆Hints for Points

Yes, because …

1.    parents are responsible for their children’s actions till they become independent.

2.    adults usually have more experience, knowledge, and common sense than their children.

No, because …

1.    one should decide one’s own future.

2.    high school students already have established a sense of self.

☆Sample Essay Structures

Sample 1

【Introduction = Outline】It is parents not their children that should finalize an important decision-making.

【Point 1】Those in parental custody should not make an important decision.  e.g. mentally dependent on their custodians

【Point 2】Parents know their children best and can see the whole picture.  e.g. quitting school

【Counterargument-treatment】Parents should allow their children some freedom and respect their personality, but when it comes to a key decision, parents are the ones who take all the responsibility especially when some problem occurs.   e.g. traffic accident

【Conclusion = Wrap-up】Major decisions should be made by those who are responsible for the results.

Sample 2

【Introduction = Outline】I entirely disagree with the idea that people aged 16 to 18 should leave important decision-making about them to their parents.

【Point 1】Older teens are mature enough to decide important things by themselves.  e.g. voting right

【Point 2】Important decisions are related to children’s future, who will face the consequences.

e.g. whether to go to college or not, which major to choose

【Counterargument-treatment】Mistakes may occur, but trial and error is necessary to be independent.

【Conclusion = Wrap-up】 late teens can make a right decision and not allowing it is over-parenting.

♦Your Sample Essay Structure

【Introduction = Outline】

【Point 1】

【Point 2】

【Point 3】

【Conclusion = Wrap-up】

Pre-TOEFL writing, why automobiles/bicycles/airplanes have changed people’s lives?

Writing Topic

Choose one of the following transportation vehicles and explain why you think it has changed people’s lives: automobiles/bicycles/airplanes. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

☆Let’s Think

How can we prove something has changed people’s lives? One way would be to show how our lives are different before and after the change. For example, before the popularization of the jet-plane, not many people used to go overseas and doing it was expensive, but, in these days, people use the plane not only for business but also for fun, expanding and diversifying their activities.

☆Hints for Points

Automobiles

1.    have helped development by increasing mobility of goods and people.  Cars have taken places of horses.

2.    have enabled people to travel around the country. Many people never left their hometown till they die.

3.    have made our future insecure by causing global warming.

Bicycles

1.    have increased mobility of people, especially those who did not have cars or horses.  increased freedom for many people, especially females

2.    have become a new sport or means of exercise.  

3.    currently are appreciated as an environmentally-friendly means of transportation.

Airplanes

1.    have accelerated globalization, making international mobility of materials and people faster. 

e.g.  international mail and packages reaching their destinations much faster than before

2.    have allowed many people to enjoy international tours.  

3.    have increased the proliferation (spread) of organisms around the globe  e.g. extinction, pandemic

☆Sample Essay Structures

【Introduction = Outline】Cars have expanded the sphere of our activity and changed the outlook of society.

【change 1】Automobiles have made our travel freer.  e.g. more flexible than trains or horses

【change 2】Economic activities have become more robust than before, revolutionized the industry, and changed urban landscapes.  e.g. easier shipping, faster transport, development of cities

【change 3】Cars have had a strong impact on our lives and the environment.  e.g. obsession with efficiency, less green due to the increase of roads, noise, accidents, air pollution, climate change

【Conclusion = Wrap-up】Automobiles seem to have helped make us anomalous as a species.

Note: 「～に影響を与える」have an effect/influence/impact on (give effect to) ～, affect/influence ～

♦Your Sample Essay Structure

【Introduction = Outline】

【Point 1】

【Point 2】

【Point 3】

【Conclusion = Wrap-up】

Pre-TOEFL writing, good points and bad points of my town or city to live in in the eye of someone I know

Writing Topic

A person you know is planning to move to your town or city. What do you think this person would like and dislike about living in your town or city? Why? Use specific reasons and details to develop your essay.

☆Let’s Think

That there is no place like home is in the eye of the beholder. In the eye of a stranger, a person you know, your town or city has a short-coming or two. Objective view of your town would help you to come up with the response to this writing topic question.

☆Hints for Points

1.    many/few facilities for entertainment/study/networking

2.    buildings and streets with beautiful/shabby appearances

3.    sufficient/insufficient transportation systems

4.    existence/absence of scholarship program/free tuition

5.    dense population/under population

6.    caring/apathetic neighbors

☆Sample Essay Structures

Sample 1

【Introduction = Outline】If one of my acquaintances plans to visit my city, the person would find it very exciting to live in but probably dislike the environment.

【good point 1】My city has many stylish places for fun and cultural facilities.  e.g. award-winning bakeries, museums and galleries

【good point 2】It is easy to get around in and out of my city.  e.g. easy access to the subway stations and highways

【bad point】Lack of nature would make some unhappy.  air pollution, noise

【Conclusion = Wrap-up】Although it is not perfect to inhabit for a long time, my city is an inspiring place for most people.

Sample 2

【Introduction = Outline】I live in a college town in the middle of the mountains. Most people may find my town boring and a little inconvenient, but bookworms may like to live in it.

【bad point 1】 There are few facilities.  e.g. few coffee shops or restaurants, no sports center

【bad point 2】 The municipal office does not collect some types of waste.   cardboard boxes, fluorescent light bulbs

【good point】There are many facilities for reading. e. g. many book stores, a good library, a museum dedicated to a famous cartoonist. 

【Conclusion = Wrap-up】 Other than a small garbage-related problem, the living conditions of my town would be judged good especially for students.

♦Your Sample Essay Structure

【Introduction = Outline】

【Point 1】

【Point 2】

【Point 3】

【Conclusion = Wrap-up】

TOEFL, iBT, Independent Writing, Anthropogenic impact on the environment - rewrite -

Anthropogenic impact on the environment

Writing Topic

If is often said that the Earth is being seriously damaged by humans. Others feel that the ecological damage of human activity has been exaggerated, and that humans are making the Earth a better place to live. Which opinion do you agree with?

☆Let’s Think

We hear things like the first statement every day. Most people seem to agree on the view that humankind is harming the earth. Let’s take a look at the second one. It says that the idea of the first statement is an exaggeration and that we are “making the earth a better place to live.” The question is for whom are we making the earth a better place to live.

   Humans try to change nature into what humans want to be. We build roads in fields and mountains for transportation, build structures as shelters from elements and for other purposes, or make facilities for energy such as water pipes or nuclear reactors. We build cities so that we can live fending for ourselves together. However, when one gets something there is another that loses it. When human society gains something involving nature (development), the environment loses something (destruction).

Human Activity ↙           ↘ Development of Society    ⇔   Destruction of the Environment

When we were cavemen, most of our activities were part of nature. Like other animals, we slept in our “nests,” and hunted and gathered what we needed to survive. We made a fire to cook, but it was not enough to cause global warming. Perhaps we collected pretty stones and shells for some reason, but the amount was probably not so much as to damage the environment.

   Now, highly-developed technologies allow us to affect the environment on a large scale. We clear cut forests to make towns and fields, bulldoze mountains to get minerals, and drill rocks in the desert and ocean bottoms to get oil and gas. We also kill insects with chemicals to grow food, overfish to satisfy our palate, and wipe out some species for fashion and hobbies. We pollute the air, water, and soil for production and transportation. In addition, we have started global warming by releasing a large amount of greenhouse gases into the air.

   By doing these things, we invade other animals’ natural habitats, deplete natural resources and destroy the environment. To survive, to expand our territories, and to enjoy ourselves, we are doing harm to nature. It is obvious that our activities are causing environmental strain. Our activities might make our lives better but affect nature.

   The word “ecological damage” in the writing topic is about disturbing Mother Earth and causing decline or extinction of lives. It is predicted that about one-fourth of all plants and vertebrate animals may go extinct by 2050 due to global warming. Ecological damage seems to be no exaggeration.

   Of course we cannot live like a caveman. We need energy. We need food. Development is good for us. However, it is usually bad for the environment, and in the end it is bad for us as well because humankind is part of nature.

☆Notes

1. Global Warming Controversy: There are some people and scientists who are skeptical about global warming theory, but “there is a strong consensus that global surface temperatures have increased in recent decades and that the trend is caused mainly by human-induced emissions of greenhouse gases. (Wikipedia)” Moreover, it has been reported that scientists who strongly deny global warming have received money from oil companies.

2. Climategate: In 2009, one of the global warming research centers was hacked and robbed of its emails, which were used to raise suspicions of “global warming conspiracy” or “climategate.” Based on some of the email messages, skeptics claimed that global warming was a hoax. However, rigorous investigations concluded that there was nothing wrong with what the researchers were doing and it was proved that global warming is not a hoax: “Over the course of the next year, six independent investigations looked into the allegations. None of the inquiries found evidence of fraud or scientific misconduct. (Wikipedia)”

3. An Inconvenient Truth: An Academy Award-winning documentary film about climate change, or global warming, presented by former United States Vice President Al Gore. Al Gore’s claim is that global warming is real and largely human-caused. (Wikipedia)

☆Essay Structure

♦Sample essay structure in the case that you have two or three reasons to support your argument

【Introduction = Outline】I agree with the view that the Earth is being seriously damaged by humans because there are many historical evidences.

【Point 1】 Civilizations has harmed the environment and made many species go extinct. 

e.g.  agriculture → water shortage, methane emissions  meat-eating → extinctions of game animals

【Point 2】 Global warming and pollution are killing us as well as other life.

【Point 3 / Counterargument-treatment】Even though technology compensate for the damage, irreversible changes have already taken place.

【Conclusion = Wrap-up】Development is largely good for us humans, but the ecological damage of human activity is no exaggeration.

Notes:

(1) A counterargument is an argument that points out a vulnerable part of your argument. Taking up a counterargument and rebutting it will make your essay more convincing. When there is a counterargument that most people seem to come up with, avoiding it will make your argument week. Thus, let’s take up counterarguments, deal with them logically, and get a high score.    

(2) typical mistakes related to this topic: 「環境」the environment（theは必要）、「自然」nature (theは不要)、「緑・植物」green (複数のsは不要)、「開発」development（pは1個）、「地球」(the) Earth/earth、「人、人類」humans/humankind/human beings/human species / man （無冠詞）/humanity（複数形=humanitiesは「文系」）

☆Your sample essay structure

Please keep it in mind to clarify the connection between human activity and its negative/positive effects on the ecology when you write your essay on this topic. 

e.g. cutting trees to build houses → fewer creatures → destruction of the eco-system

【Introduction = Outline】

【Point 1】

【Point 2】

【Point 3 / Counterargument-treatment】

【Conclusion = Wrap-up】

☆Essay for ideas and expressions

The following essay is taken from Writing for the TOEFL iBT, Barron’s:

xxx

国際教養AO入試 reference, religious bondage

Losing my religion: life after extreme belief

The Guardian   April 10, 2016

http://www.theguardian.com/world/2016/apr/10/losing-my-religion-life-after-extreme-belief-faith

Pre-TOEFL writing, Has preparation of food becoming easier improved our lives?

Writing Topic

Nowadays, food has become easier to prepare. Has this change improved the way people live? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

☆Let’s Think

That food has become easier to prepare means it has become faster and less troublesome thanks to the technological advancement such as the electrification of cooking tools, invention of instant food, and development of ready-to-eat food industry, food has become easier to prepare. Now. technological advancement has both good points and bad points, so this change may not have improved the way people live in all aspects of life.

☆Hints for Points

Good points

1.    faster, saves time, helps make time to do other things

2.    reduce stress related to cooking especially for mothers

Bad points

1.    loss of skills, loss of tradition

2.    less communication between family members

3.    fewer chances to develop creativity

4.    lower dietary life: less tasty, less enjoyable in texture, not fresh, less healthy, contain a lot of chemicals such as additives and preservatives

☆Sample Essay Structures

Sample 1

【Introduction = Outline】Less time to prepare food means more time to improve life.

【good point 1】Reduction of cooking time lead to higher production.  e.g. rice cooker

【good point 2】Release from manual labor leads to higher mental activity.  e.g. social reform lead by housewives

【counterargument-treatment】Some might deplore decline of food culture. However, those interested in cooking are even more enthusiastic about improving their eating experience.   e.g. cook books

【Conclusion = Wrap-up】Efficiency is fundamentally helpful in improving life.

Sample 2

【Introduction = Outline】It is true that most of us have experienced the convenience of this change. However, it is doubtful whether it has improved our lives especially in terms of quality.

【good points】Electric appliances and convenience food save us time to do other things although most of us have become busier because of increased workload assigned for the extra time saved by the technology.

【bad point 1】The strong tastes of ready-to-eat foods make you less sensitive about tastes and they are addictive.  e.g. very sweet or salty food with a lot of fat in it

【bad point 2】 An important part of life is lost by the reduction of the cooking process.  e.g. People do not make traditional food such as ohagi cakes for ancestors any more or few families pound mochi, rice cakes for New Year’s feast, together these days. 

【Conclusion = Wrap-up】 Diet makes up a significant part of life, and simplified cooking has somewhat lowered the quality of our life by making it gross.

♦Your Sample Essay Structure

【Introduction = Outline】

【Point 1】

【Point 2】

【Point 3】

【Conclusion = Wrap-up】

TOEFL, iBT, Independent Writing, Which would you choose: a high-paying job with long working hours or a lower-paying job with shorter working hours? - rewrite -

Working hours and pay

Wring Topic

Which would you choose: a high-paying job with long working hours or a lower-paying job with shorter working hours? Support your response by including specific reasons and examples.

☆Let’s think:

When you look around you and try to see which of these two working conditions most people choose, the answer seems to be easy. Most people want to be hired as a full-time worker for regular income.

Students and housewives prefer part-time jobs to study or raise children respectively. Jobs that they can find are usually not high-paying.

Actually, the real employment patterns are not so simple. Trying to cut costs, companies do not raise regular workers’ salaries and many non-regular workers are becoming the working poor, whose wages are so low that they have to work more than ten hours a day or work at two different places a day to make ends meet.

Be that as it may, the essential quality of this question is two-alternative―it asks you which of the two you prioritize, money or time, and why.

☆Hints for Points

I choose a high-paying job with long working hours because …

1.    It seems that it is common sense to choose a job with regular working hours. I would like to be a respected citizen. I would like to wear a business suit and work from 9 to 5 on week days and enjoy leisure time spending some money on my favorite activities on weekends.

2.    I like working. I would spend as much time as I can to learn the job, expand my knowledge, and improve my skills.

3.    I need money. Some people might view my desire as materialistic, but I would like to live in a safe and comfortable place, wear decent clothes, and eat as much safe food as possible to live a long healthy life. I think this desire of mine is rather humble.

I choose a lower-paying job with shorter working hours because …

1.    I would like to continue my study over the next ten years. I would like to pass a few tests. I also would like to see the world.

2.    I just cannot work regularly. I am not inclined to long working hours. This does not mean that I am lazy. I have a strong power of concentration, while my body clock is just not attuned to the so called regular life pattern.

3.    Even if you have a lot of money, if you do not have time to spend it to make you feel you are alive, your life is a failure.

☆Essay Structure

Sample 1

【Introduction = Outline】I would like to be wealthy.

【Point 1】I have a hard-working nature.

【Point 2】A respectable person makes a lot of money by working energetically.

【Point 3 / Counterargument-treatment】Although the saying goes, “All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy, I would like to enjoy a high standard of living.

【Conclusion = Wrap-up】Children play and adults work. I will work and enjoy life to the utmost when I graduate.

Sample 2

【Introduction = Outline】I would choose a lower-paying job with shorter working hours because time is life as the author of Momo says.

【Point 1】I do not want to be a cog in a machine.

【Point 2】My lifestyle does not require a lot of money.

【Point 3 / Counterargument-treatment】Life of part-time workers is precarious, but the situation which current regular workers face is not so different from that of part-time workers. The company can go bankrupt or they can lose their job if they become seriously ill. Unless you become a millionaire, you cannot have a safe and secure life, and I have no will to join this jungle-law game. It is better for me to be eaten than to eat someone else.

【Conclusion = Wrap-up】To stay as human as possible in this modern world of insanity, I would be happy to be less paid and have more leisure time.

Your sample essay structure

Introduction

Your choice Reasons: 1) 　　　　　　　　　2) 　　　　　　　　　　3)

Body

About Reason 1)   e.g.

About Reason 2) e.g.

About Reason 3) or Counterargument Treatment e.g.

Conclusion

Note: What you write in the introduction and the conclusion are the same. Also, the reasons you provide in the introduction are the same that are dealt with in the body. Although you could use exactly the same words and expressions, using different words and expressions for the same idea is preferable. The Introduction is the outline of the whole essay. The body is the detail of the introduction. The conclusion is the sum-up.　You could make a full introduction, which is complete with the hook, background, and the thesis, but sticking with writing at least the thesis is enough since you have only thirty minutes to finish the essay.