2019年5月27日月曜日

TOEFL iBT Independent Writing, Is having increasing numbers of students graduating from college good or bad?. - revised -

Writing Topic

Some people believe that a college or university diploma has become far less meaningful than before, with ever larger percentages of people receiving higher-levels of education. Others believe that it is a positive development to have increasing numbers of students graduating from college. Discuss these views. Which view do you agree with?




Let’s Think

Discuss the following.

1.      This is a long writing topic. What would be the first thing to do to answer this kind of writing topic?

Note: The first thing to do to answer this king of writing topic would be to read the two opposite views carefully and analyze them.



2.      Discuss the first view. Why do you think 
they say this? What kind of values is the idea based on?

Note: The first view, a college or university diploma has become far less meaningful than before, with ever larger percentages of people receiving higher-levels of education, is negative about rising college-bound rates and reminds you of the phrase, “scarcity value”. This opinion sees a college or university diploma as something like a commodity that has a value in the market. The market is probably the job market in this case. When you apply for a job, having a higher educational background than others is an advantage. Unlike those living long time ago, however, most people in developed countries go to college now and there is little advantage in having a bachelor’s degree when you try to find a job.



3.      Discuss the second view. What does development mean here? What kind of values is the idea based on?

Note: The second view says that having more college graduates is a positive development. It is probably about the development of society with the increase of the number of highly-educated citizens. What is good about society filled with people with higher-levels of education? Well-educated people can read and write well. They have a lot of general knowledge and have been trained to think logically and conclude based on evidences. Many of them also have special knowledge and skills for specific jobs. Developing countries with good leaders spend a lot of money on education especially on university education because they need highly-trained human resources to build their countries: engineers, doctors, office workers, teachers, and many other professions that require at least a college degree. This is fundamentally true to developed countries, too. Increasing numbers of college graduates indicates prosperity.



4.      What is you view on this topic?



Note: Each view has a point. The difference between these views might be the values that they are based on. What does a college diploma mean? Why do you go to college?




Hints for points

Discussion points on the first view

1.    If most people have a bachelor’s degree, having one means that you are average, not special.


2.    Having a college degree is no longer an advantage when you look for a good job.


3.    The trend automatically requires you to acquire more than the college or university degree to make a head-start in society.



Discussion points on the second view

1.    The more people go to university, the better future we will have. Highly-educated workforce will develop society. Developing countries that spend a lot of money on higher education are doing well while those that do not or cannot stay poor. Modern industrialized society requires highly-qualified workers with good interpersonal skills. College or university graduates meet these needs and some even have special skills that many companies are in need of.


2.    Geniuses appear when cultural level of societies are high. Statistically, children of college graduates are more likely to go college. With so many problems concerning all human beings such as energy problems and food shortage, we are in dire need of many brilliant people who can handle this situation.


3.    Well-educated citizens can protect democracy. If most people are highly educated, they can understand what politicians and corporate officials are doing, and can prevent politics from going wrong.


4.    Open admission is a step to equal society. In many countries, college education is still only for the elite. Also, few women were allowed to go to college a hundred years ago. If the day comes when all people on the earth can go to college, it will be an accomplishment of humankind.


5.    Knowledge and skills acquired at college will make the person’s everyday life easier and more enjoyable. If the number of individuals who are happy increases, it can be said that it is a good thing.




Essay for Ideas and Expressions:

Although the hard work one does to go to college does not seem to be rewarded as many others go to college now, I personally consider it intrinsically good that more people have contact with the best in education. It will contribute to the development of society and will enrich individuals’ life.



It is true that the value of college diploma as qualification goes down as more people go to college. Having a bachelor’s degree is no longer a great advantage. Most people in developed countries go to college and no one makes much of a college degree anymore. Seventy years ago, graduating from college or university was an accomplishment, but now, it is a preliminary for white-color employment.



However, it is also true that having higher numbers of college graduates is a positive development. First, it develops the economy. As the education level of a society goes up, so do the living standards of the people. In a developed economy, college or university education seems to be redundant. Many college graduates in rich countries are doing the job that high school graduates were doing fifty years ago. Still, the fact that the same job is done by a person with higher academic background means the society benefits from the well-educated personnel, who are trained to work effectively and pro-actively.



Second, it will be good for the cohesion of the community. If a larger percentage of citizens are well-educated, it will be easier to reach a consensus on issues that require higher levels of knowledge to understand. For example, today’s world is full of such issues as global warming and immigration crisis for right perception of which mind of enlightenment is required. In addition, the more conscious and informed citizens become, the more critical issues they can solve. This is especially important when they have a delinquent government. Informed citizens will not let it deceive them and ruin their lives.



Lastly, more individuals having the luxury of receiving higher education means more people given chances to make their lives more fulfilling. At university, people are trained to think in scientific ways, see things from multiple perspectives, and keep themselves informed and inspired even after graduation. The increasing numbers of housewives with college diplomas means more informed mothers and happier children.



Experiences in highly academic circumstances will light up each individual’s life and collectively this is good for society. Therefore, I believe that to have more college graduates is a positive development that should be celebrated. A bachelor’s degree is not only a qualification for job-hunting but also a building block of society.





Your Sample Essay Structure

Reminder: The topic instructs you to discuss both views.

Introduction = Outline

Point 1


Point 2


Point 3


Conclusion = Wrap-up

2019年5月19日日曜日

TOEFL iBT Independent Writing, Drill, The automobile has done nothing but causing serious problems.

Discuss the following statement, write a short essay on it including sentences with the structures below, and write comments on or correct mistakes of each other’s essay. Technology has improved our lives.

●not only but also …. 「~だけでなくも」
場所, where …., 「~ 場所、その場所で(に)….

Hints for Points: long and healthy life, improvement of the standard of living, increase of knowledge, pollution, global warming, unhappy feelings

Essay    
                                                                                                   
                                                                                                   
                                                                                                    
                                                                                                   
                                                                                                   
                                                                                                    
                                                                                                   
                                                                                                   
                                                                                                   
                                                                                                    
                                                                                                   
                                                                                                   
                                                                                                    
                                                                                                   
                                                                                                    
                                                                                                   
                                                                                                   
Comments
                                                                                                    
                                                                                                   
                                                                                                  

TOEFL iBT Independent Writing, Drill, High school students who are going to major in science at university do not have to take humanities courses.



Drill
Discuss the following statement, write a short essay on it including sentences with the structures below, and write comments on or correct mistakes of each other’s essay. High school students who are going to major in science at university do not have to take humanities courses.

●In the past, . Today, however, …. 「過去においては、~だった。しかし現在は、。」
●Besides ing, S must …. 「~するのに加えて、Sしなくてはならない。」

Hints for Points: Doctorsmind-body unrelatedunderstanding patients’ feelingspsychology, literature, Researchersfew global issues related to scienceglobal warming, pandemic, mass extinction, the Internet, terrorismgeography, economics, politics, cultures, Science Teachersfew historical events that science majors should knownuclear weapons, fossil fuels, chemical fertilizers and insecticideshistory

Essay    
                                                                                                    
                                                                                                   
                                                                                                    
                                                                                                   
                                                                                                   
                                                                                                    
                                                                                                   
                                                                                                   
                                                                                                   
                                                                                                    
                                                                                                   
                                                                                                   
                                                                                                    
                                                                                                   
                                                                                                    
                                                                                                   
                                                                                                   
                                                                                                    
                                                                                                   
                                                                                                    

Comments
                                                                                                    
                                                                                                   
                                                                                                    
                                                                                                   
                                                                                                   
                                                                                                    

TOEFL iBT Independent Writing. The most important thing business corporations should invest in is the education and training of their employees. - revised -


Writing Topic
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. The most important thing business corporations should invest in is the education and training of their employees.



Let’s Think
1.      What is investment?
--- Investment is spending resources in something for future returns. The word investment usually means buying stocks, which will increase capitals of corporations. If the company does well, investors will gain returns (dividends). We also use the word investment figuratively as in “You should invest your time and energy in many things so that you can have wider choices when you try to find a job.” Thus, investment is spending many kinds of resources for future returns.

2.      What is the major goal of the corporation?
--- The major goal of the corporation is to make profits. They invest their money to make profits,

3.      How can you decide that something is the most important?
--- To decide that something is the most important, we need to compare the thing with all the other counterparts.

4.      What does a business invest its resources in?
--- For example, if you start an ice cream shop, you need a place, some equipment, materials, workers, advertisements, research and development, and so on.

5.      How will well-educated employees contribute to making profits?

6.      Is educating employees more important than renting a good-looking building, buying efficient machines, buying better ingredients, using a famous advertising company, or upgrading or inventing a good product or service? Why/Why not?


Hints for Points
1.    Well-educated employees will contribute to making profits. What will happen if you make more efforts in educating and training employees? Here are some results you can expect.
a.    Productivity will increase because they will work more efficiently. They will work more in less time with fewer mistakes and then.
b.    Training costs will decrease because they will educate themselves and each other.
c.     Turnover rates and lower hiring costs will be lower because they will be loyal to the company.
d.    They will contribute to evolving the company especially when it needs to change if they become loyal to the company.
e.     Public relations (PR) will improve as good employees will improve the company image.They will help distinguish your company from your competitors.

2.    What about other things to invest in?
a.    Place: Customers may increase. Consumers will give it a try with a new building.
b.    Facilities and materials: You can make better products more efficiently and more safely, and they can sell well.
c.     Advertisement: You can make your company known to more people. You might also get consumers to have better image of the company and the products.
d.    Research and development (R & D): The goods and services the company provides will be more competitive.

3.    What is the decisive reason?
workers > other factors
a.    A machine will not change but a person will.
b.    Loyalty, morale, and passion are vital for a company to survive.

workers another factor/other factors
a.    It is innovation that will make the firm survive in competition.
b.    AI learns much faster and makes better decisions than humans.


Essay for Ideas and Expressions
Because of the contract stipulating that corporations work in order to increase the capital that their shareholders have invested in, most companies treat their workers as consumable supplies. However, I believe that the most important thing business corporations should invest in is the education and training of their employees. Employees are the roots of a company tree and they should be treated well.

Many companies give workers little education and easily make them redundant. Not only do they lay off workers for better bottom lines but also they try to cut costs by offshoring for cheap labor or using robots. However, not to speak of being inhumane, these practices will not lead to development of the company. Uneducated workforce cannot perform well. High absenteeism and serious errors caused by their low morale will cost the company money, which can be prevented by education and training. Dismissal of unskilled workers along with robotization will bring only a short-term profit. By turning unskilled workers that are diligent but are to be replaced by robots into skilled workers, companies will be free from the problem of skilled labor shortage and can make long-term profits. Marginalizing workers is not wise.

Training workers is beneficial because it pays off more than investing in machines. If you spend some extra time and money to show your employees how the business works, they will have more interest in it. If you show them how to work quickly and neatly, they will practice it. If you share your ideas about a new product, they can come up with better ones. You might also receive valuable information or opinions from the people who actually do the job. There is an idea that people work for money and educating them does little to improve their performance, but it is condescending to have such an idea about workers. Most people have desire for improvement and companies should invest in it. If frequent training makes some workers unhappy for some reason and can have adverse effect, training sessions except for basic ones can be made optional. Yet, most people will not waste the time and money for training as long as they are treated properly.

In terms of other areas of investment a company has to consider, it should be remembered that the performance of the people who are in charge will determine the outcome. Product development needs the brain for innovation more than anything else. Marketing requires not only data but also insight and intuition that come from knowledge and experience of a mankind, not an AI. Sales relies mostly on sales staff because customers need to trust the company before buying their products. Manufacturing is improved by attentiveness and ingenuity of the workers on the floor. People are the decisive factor in any area of investment of business.

Personnel are the most valuable asset of a company, which determines the total productivity of the company. Therefore, their training and education is the most important thing for business corporations to invest in.


Body Structure Samples
Sample Body Structure A
Body 1Merits of employee education
Body 2Merits of other types of investment
Body 3Your decision

Sample Body Structure B
Body 1Benefit of employee education 1
Body 2Benefit of employee education 2
Body 3Reasons why employee education outweigh other types of investment

Your original body structure
Point 1
Point 2
Point 3