Class Supplement, TOEFL Integrated Writing 4 - rewrite -

Question:

Summarize the processor’s defense of utilitarianism, and show how far it meets the objections set out in the text passage.

Sample Response:

Warning that it is not a good idea to disregard utilitarianism completely, the professor counters objections against utilitarianism effectively by showing its viability in practical application.

In utilitarianism, what results in the greatest happiness for the greatest number is seen as the best action. The first objection set out in the text is that happiness is difficult to define as there are various factors to measure happiness and they are difficult to quantify. The professor, however, says that it is possible to find a common denominator of the notion of happiness, through survey for example. The professor also points out the significance of applying utilitarianism in fundamental affairs in reality such as supplying drinkable water to as many people as possible, albeit no one really knows what happiness is.

A second objection is that it is difficult to know the result of an action and that we usually do not consider the result when we act. The professor says that, normally, people are concerned about consequences and hence take them into account before they act and usually find the best possible choice guided by common sense.

The last objection is about the weakness of the philosophy in dealing with complicated cases such as following the teaching of always telling the truth even when it will bring about nothing but bad consequences. The utilitarian theory prioritizes good consequences and therefore telling the truth is bad in this case. However, this conclusion does not agree with our intuition that lying is bad and honesty is good. The professor’s defense is that such dilemma seldom happens, as most religious practices are moderate these days. She also reminds that rigid honesty at the expense of others is despised in the real world regardless of principle. (291 words)

この解答例の構成:

第1段落:  Lectureの要約（Textに対する反論の程度）

第2段落:  幸福の定義の難しさに関するTextの主張とLectureの反論

第3段落:  結果予測の難しさに関するTextの主張とLectureの反論

第4段落:  複雑な事例（規範の遵守による不幸な結果と論理の矛盾等）の取り扱いに対する於ける脆弱さに関するTextの主張とLectureの反論