TOEFL iBT. Independent Writing, What would you choose to learn about the future? - rewrite -

Writing Topic

Imagine that you had the power to know one thing about the future. What would you choose to learn and why? Offer specific reasons and details to support your choice.

☆Let’s Think

Discussion

1)    In the Sci-fi classic, Back to the Future, one of the characters, accidentally visiting the future with the main character, gets a copy of almanac to get some future information in gambling and tries to get rich. The main character, on the other hand, tries to fix his family bond. Which character do you sympathize?

2)    What is your main concern about the future? Here are some keys for your response:

I would like to know about the future related to

the environments: climate change, nuclear wars, etc.

world: geopolitical map, the gap between the rich and the poor, etc.

economy: next financial meltdown, etc.

medicine: highly-sophisticated medical technology, etc.

culture: fashion, language, food, etc.

life: the future outlook of my country, the day I die, etc.

3)    What makes you concerned about it?

4)    How would knowing about it benefit you?

☆Hints for Points

1.    Will my favorite species have gone extinct in the future?

2.    How do future humans/animals/plants look?

3.    Will the energy policy go well?

4.    Will the world be governed by a few extremely rich people?

5.    Will an economic system free from depressions have been established?

6.    What kind of music will the future people be listening to?

7.    Will baseball still be played in the future?

8.    Will we be having “natural” human relationships in the future?

9.    Will Japan be more internationalized?

10.  How long will I live?

☆Essay Structure

Sample 1

【Introduction】If I had the power to know one thing about the future, I would like to know if the number of psychopaths will increase in the future because it seems to me to be related to the end of our species.

【What is psychopath?】Psychopathy is a mainly congenital disorder that shows lack of empathy.

【My concern 】It seems that psychopaths will prevail in number because they can do anything without qualms. If so, treatment and education methods for them need to be developed as soon as possible.

【Counterargument-treatment】A scientific experiment in a form of a game showed that people who easily deceive and betray others for their own good do well at first but not necessarily win because of the defense or offence given later by the people they had cheated. However, this would not always apply to reality as there are cases in which the first attack is fatal.

【Conclusion】Biology and cultural anthropology tell us species with sociality will thrive. In the Darwinian sense, psychopaths might well thrive in the future and end the history of mankind. Therefore, I would like to see the result and do something for it if necessary if I could.

【主張=概略】もし将来に関してひとつ知る力があるならば、サイコパス（反社会性人格障害者）の数が将来増えるかどうかについて知りたい。なぜなら私たちの種の終わりに関連しているように思えるからだ。

【ｻｲｺﾊﾟｽとは】サイコパス的人格は共感が欠如している主に先天性の障害だ。

【自分の関心】サイコパスは平気で何でもできるので数が優勢になるように思える。もしそうなら彼らの為の治療法と教育法ができるだけ早く開発される必要がある。

【反論処理】ゲームの形をとったある科学的実験は自分の利益のために容易に他人をだまし裏切る人は最初はうまくやるが、ズルをされた人が後で防御したり攻撃したりするので必ずしも勝たないということを示している。しかし最初の攻撃が致命的な場合があるので現実には必ずしも当てはまらないだろう。

【結論＝総括】生物学と文化人類学によれば社会性のある種は反映する。進化論的な意味でサイコパスが将来繁栄すれば人類の歴史は終わるかもしれない。できるなら結果を見て必要ならなにか対処したい。

Your Sample Essay Structure

【Introduction = Outline】

【Point 1】

【Point 2】

【Point 3 / Counterargument-treatment】

【Conclusion = Wrap-up】

☆Sample Paragraph Development

【Main Idea】It seems that psychopaths will prevail in number because they can do anything with no qualm. If so, treatment and education methods for them need to be developed as soon as possible.

【Explanation】It is said that psychopaths lie about and even kill others to get what they want without guilt. Many are attractive, intelligent people, so that people around them do not notice their problem. There are psychopaths even among people with respectable occupations such as CEOs, lawyers, or surgeons. Since successful people have more chances to leave offspring, this trait of theirs will be more likely to be passed down. Moreover, as children of rich families are more likely to survive in competition, this trait will be augmented in our species.

【Detail in General】Such humane feelings as trust, sympathy, or mercy will be rare. Psychopaths take advantage of these feelings of others relentlessly. I suspect that in the beginning of our history, we had fewer of them than now, and through the mechanism of the survival of the fittest, we have attained the current rate of one out of four or five. Culture has the power to contain anti-social behavior, but, based on materialism, the culture spreading around the world now seems to not just lack this power but promote this behavior. The future will be a paradise for psychopaths. In the future, psychopaths can kill each other and humankind can see its own demise.

【Specific Detail】For example, a psychopathic ruler can attack a country in the Middle East just for his own interest and be retaliated by a psychopathic ruler who happened to be looking for an excuse to attack some country to make up for his past lie, triggering the world nuclear war. Psychopaths never care about those who will die or be injured. They never fear committing genocide.

【Follow-up】It is said that there is no cure for psychopathic personality, but science has made impossible possible in the past. Also, as all the humans are descendants of the past survivors, we all might well have more or less of the disposition.

【Wrap-up】Psychopaths’ problem is all humans’ problem.

【主張】サイコパスは平気で何でもできるので数が優勢になるように思える。もしそうなら彼らの為の治療法と教育法ができるだけ早く開発される必要がある。

【説明】サイコパスは罪悪感なしに他人について嘘をつき欲しいものを得るために人を殺しさえすると言われている。 多くが魅力的で知的な人なので周りの人は彼らの問題に気付かない。最高経営責任者や弁護士、外科医の様な立派な職業の人の中にさえサイコパスがいる。成功者は子を残す可能性がより高いので、彼らのこの形質はより受け継がれそうだ。さらには裕福な家庭の子供はより競争で生き残りそうなので、この形質は私たちの種の中で増加するだろう。

【一般的な詳細】信頼や同情や慈悲のような人間的な気持ちは稀になるだろう。サイコパスは他者のこれらの感情を容赦なく利用する。人類の歴史の始まりにはサイコパスは今より少なかったが適者生存の仕組みを通して現在の4～5人にひとりという割合を達成したのではないか。文化は反社会的行動を抑える力があるが、現在世界に広がりつつある文化は物質主義に基づいておりこの力が欠如しているばかりが反社会的行動を促進する。未来はサイコパスの楽園になるだろう。将来はサイコパス同士がお互いを殺し合って人類は終わる可能性がある。

【具体的な詳細】例えばあるサイコパスの支配者が自分の都合で中東のある国を核爆弾で攻撃し、それに対し過去の自分の嘘を隠すためにどこかの国を攻撃する口実を探していたサイコパスの支配者が報復し、世界的な核戦争を引き起こすかもしれない。サイコパスは亡くなる人達や負傷する人達の事は一切気にしない。大量虐殺を犯すことを決して恐れない。

【補足】サイコパス的な人格への治療はないと言われているが科学は不可能を可能にしてきた。また、全ての人類は過去の生存者の子孫なので、私たち皆が多かれ少なかれこの気質を持っているかもしれない。

【まとめ】サイコパスの問題は人間すべての問題だ。

Your Sample Paragraph Development

【Main Idea】

【Explanation】

【Detail / Example in general】

【More Specific Detail / Example】

【Follow-up】

【Wrap-up】