TOEFL, iBT, Independent Writing, Select one of these jobs and explain why you think that job is helpful to your society: 1) actor, 2) lawyer, 3) tour guide. - rewrite -

Writing Topic:

Many different jobs are important to society for different reasons. Select one of these jobs and explain why you think that job is helpful to your society: 1) actor, 2) lawyer, 3) tour guide. Support your essay with specific reasons and examples.

                           

☆Let’s Think

This topic has two directions. The first direction is “Select one of these jobs,” so you are supposed to choose one of the three jobs given at the end of the topic. The next direction is to explain how you think your society benefits from the job you have chosen. You are not required to compare the three jobs, and neither are you required to choose the most important. The topic just says, “Choose one and explain why it is important to your society?” Let’s note the first sentence of this topic: Many different jobs are important to society for different reasons, meaning each job has its own significance. This premise sets the condition that you do not compare or contrast jobs in dealing with this topic.

♦The questions of the same type

TOEFL Writing Topics of the same type as this one are as follows:

(1)  Choose one of the following transportation vehicles and explain why you think it has changed people’s lives.  • automobiles   • bicycles   • airplanes

(2)  Many parts of the world are losing important natural resources, such as forests, animals, or clean water. Choose one resource that is disappearing and explain why it needs to be saved.

♦Similar but different types of questions

Now, here are question patterns that look similar to but different from that of today’s topic:

(3)  A friend of yours has received some money and plans to use all of it either

• to go on vacation   • to buy a car

Your friend has asked you for advice. Compare your friend’s two choices and explain which one you think your friend should choose.

(4)  You have enough money to purchase either a house or a business. Which would you choose to buy?

(5)  What do you want most in a friend — someone who is intelligent, or someone who has a sense of humor, or someone who is reliable? Which one of these characteristics is most important to you?

Question (3) requires you to compare the choices. To answer Question (4) and (5), even though it is not clearly stated, you also need to compare the choices because you cannot tell, in other words, you cannot convince the reader about, which is better or the best without showing why one is better or more preferable than the other(s).

☆Hints for points

An actor …

♦helps you learn about people, life, and the world.

-- by acting in a movie on something special like a historical event or a personal experience  (e.g. historical movie, biographical picture etc.)

♦helps develop your imagination and creativity, which helps make life more enjoyable with visions about the past, present, and future, or helps you become a creative person like an artist, scientist, or entrepreneur.

-- by helping you experience a life which is totally different from yours or a fictional life that are often more real than a real life  (e.g. science fiction movie, animated film, etc.)

♦helps you release stress.

 -- by playing the role of an incredible character  (e.g. action, superhero movie, comedy, etc.)

A lawyer …

♦protects one’s rights.

-- by giving advice on what claim one can make and preparing for the law suit (e.g. unfair trial, improper dismissal, copy rights, violation of privacy, minority crime cases, etc.)

♦can shed light on serious issues in society and help make a difference.

-- by taking up a case influential to society (e.g. damages caused by pollution, women’s rights, death penalty, neglect of the government, etc.)

A tour guide …

♦helps people experience unfamiliar places and cultures safely and easily.

-- by assisting tourists make the most of their tour (e.g. giving information and advice, translating languages, making arrangements for tourists, etc.)

♦plays a role of a citizen diplomat.

-- by assisting in mutual understanding (e.g. helping tourists and the people in the place they are visiting communicate with each other, leaving good impression of the people and the country in tourists’ minds and vice versa, etc.)

☆Paragraph development

A paragraph of the body of an essay often develops its main idea as follows:

【Main Idea】 (主張)

【Explanation】 (主張の説明)

【Detail / Example in general】 (一般的な例)

【More Specific Detail / Example】 (より具体的な例)

【Conclusion】 (結論)

♦Sample Paragraph Development

【Main Idea】Lawyers help us protect our rights.

【Explanation】They are specialists of laws and fight in court for their clients.

【Detail / Example in general】 For example, a lawyer can give advice on what claim can be made and will prepare for the law suit if necessary.

【More Specific Detail / Example】 If there is an employee whose contract has been terminated for no proper reason, his lawyer will find the evidence of the wrongdoing of his client’s former employer and helps him get his job back or get compensated for the damage caused by the dismissal.

【Conclusion】In this way, the lawyer helps protect fundamental human rights, right to pursue happiness in this case.

Note: Probably because of the thought process rooted in our culture, we Japanese tend to start with details and end with the general idea in writing, the opposite of the English essay structure, which goes from general to specific. Though it is difficult to change our thought process, it might be easy to change the way we present our thoughts. It might be a good idea to write first following our thought process, from specific details to general ideas, and then rearrange them to fit the English essay structure. In the case of the paragraph structure model above, it might be easier for us to fill in the 【More Specific Detail / Example】first, and then write above it a sentence that generalizes the example,【Detail / Example in general】.  Also, a more generalized sentence can be added before the sentence written as the thesis of the paragraph during brainstorming.

Your test paragraph development

Now let’s practice paragraph development. Choose one of the reasons you have come up with, make it the main idea, and develop it using the following form. As this is just a practice, make it simple, focusing on the logic and ideas.

【Main Idea】

【Explanation】

【Detail / Example in general】

【More Specific Detail / Example】

【Conclusion】