TOEFL iBT independent writing, Would you rather be self-employed, work for someone else, or own a business? -partly rewritten-

Writing Topic

Some people prefer to work for themselves or own a business. Others prefer to work for an employer. Would you rather be self-employed, work for someone else, or own a business? Use specific reasons to explain your choice.

☆Let’s think

Owing a business provides a lot of freedom as well as responsibility. Working for an employer can be stressful in some ways or depending on person even though it is often the case that you can forget about work once you leave your office. Being self-employed allows some freedom but it is basically the same as working for someone else, because you cannot refuse job-offers for fear of missing opportunities in the future. Which suits your value and character?

☆Paragraph Development

Let’s practice paragraph development once again, for a well developed paragraph is indispensable in writing an essay persuasive enough to satisfy ETS raters.

【Main Idea】  To represent the paragraph briefly

【Explanation】  To show exactly what you mean by the main idea

【Detail / Example】 To provide a specific example

【Follow up】  To make up for some information lacking in the example

【Conclusion】 To wrap up the paragraph

                                            

Sample paragraph development:

【Main Idea】 Owning a business would give me a lot of freedom.

【Explanation】 It would allow me to try new ideas.

【Detail / Example】 If you work for an employer, it is almost impossible to put new ideas into practice. You are supposed to do your assignment under the policy decided by your employer. But if you are the boss, you can carry out your idea at your discretion.

【Follow up】 It is true that decision making in business actually involves a lot of consultation with other executives because there are many things for a CEO to consider such as affecting the community or jeopardizing the fate of your employees and clients, but this is the same in any other important decisions. As long as I am aware of my responsibility and listen to others, I think I can do well, and the pressure and bother won’t prevent me from feeling thrilled by the challenge in business.

【Conclusion】 I think my life would be livelier if I owned a business.

☆Your test paragraph development:

【Main Idea】

【Explanation】

【Detail / Example】

【Follow up】

【Conclusion】

☆Essay for Ideas and Expressions

 (Barron’s, Writing for the TOEFL iBT, pp.280-281)
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