TOEFL iBT Academic Discussion and Writing What events make a person an adult? - rewrite -

 

Writing Topic
People recognize a difference between children and adults. What events (experiences or ceremonies) make a person an adult? Use specific reasons and examples to explain your answer.


☆Let’s Think

1.       Being an adult can be decided by several factors like legal, biological, economic or social factors. What makes one an adult in terms of each of them? Which of these aspects is the best to use to answer the question of this writing topic?

Note: The Coming-of-Age Day marks your legal adulthood. Biological adulthood is going through puberty. Economic independence and becoming a new parent can be events that makes a person an adult. However, words like “adult children” or “man-child” show that even biological or social adulthood is not enough to make someone an adult. Another expression “helicopter parents” describes parents who are not mentally independent from their children. Therefore, “mental independence” can be another condition to be called an adult.

 

2.       What events make a person mentally independent and socialized, in other words mature?
Note: The question specifically says, “What events (experiences or ceremonies),” and so you are required to cite specific events that cause transformation from childhood into adulthood.

 

☆Hints for Points

Economic independence

Money is not everything, but money very often decides relationships. As long as your parents are paying for what is necessary for your survival, they treat you as such, someone in their custody. Also, until you have a job, you are not fully responsible for yourself and hence you are not full-fledged as a member of society.

 

Change of the position in the family

When a person has a child, the person becomes a parent, an adult. Now the person has to think and act like an adult to play a role of a care-giver, and over time, the person will become a real adult. Loss of parents can also have the same effect. The part of the person who was a child of the lost parent will be lost or go through a change, and the person will act like a child less often than before.

 

Mental independence

Many people are looked upon as adults even though they are economically or physically not independent. For example, a woman whose illness does not allow her to support herself can be mentally mature. She can be respected by others for her integrity, wisdom, and abundant love for others. Therefore, events that develop these qualities can make a person an adult. Experiencing love which is strong enough to set the beloved free or loss of your family member that makes you think what life and relationships are some of such events.

 

Mind development

Childish people are those who are selfish, impatient, and thoughtless. They do not understand that they are members of society, do not have respect for others, and cause trouble by following impulses without thinking of the results. Therefore, people who do these things less often can be called adults. An event or events that intensively expose a child to the adult world might cause this maturation, such as participating in community projects or joining the Boy Scouts or Girl Scouts.

 

Reliability

Parents stop, either consciously or unconsciously, giving directions to their children when they realize that their children know what to do, and so their directions are unnecessary and that they would probably get better results if they leave everything to their children. This usually happens after events like their children being assigned to an important job in their community, school, or work place. Through taking responsibility, children become adults, who know what to do and are confident to take care of an unexpected situation.

 

Awareness of self-responsibility

A person becomes an adult when an event makes the person stop blaming others of his or her problem. If you are an adult, you know the fact that no one can fully take care of you and accept it. We help and love each other, but on the individual level, there is no one but yourself that you can rely on. Parents, even if they love their child, might not be able to give the child the best care. A wife cannot always watch her husband’s health no matter how much she loves him. When the child grows up to be physically or mentally weak, when the husband gets a lifestyle-related disease, they have to face the problem by themselves. An adult is a person who takes personal responsibility for granted.

 

 

☆The Body Structure of Your Essay

【Point 1】

【Point 2】

【Point 3】

 

 

Paragraph Development

Study how the passages in “Hints for Points” are developed, and try developing one of the points you made above.

【Main Idea】

 

【Supporting Details】

 

 

 

【Follow-up】*

 

 

 

【Conclusion】

 

 

 

*Follow-up is additional information, especially to answer your readers’ questions when you think they have a question about what you have written.